BoringYetGraceful

written in Tagalog-English originally posted: July 31, 2022

I think frustration wins when we literally stop on what we are working pero mananalo lang naman siya if huminto ka na talaga at di ka na umusad sa buhay.

Salip kuwit, nilagyan mo agad ng tuldok. At least fresh start naman ang kasunod ne? Ang tanong gusto mo ba mag simula ulit?

Lahat naman tayo may kinauumayan, pwedeng yung katabi mo sa tarbaho, trabaho mo, kapitbahay mo, or ex mo na nakahanap agad ng kapalit sa'yo the next day after ng break-up, after 48 years ikaw single pa din, ang lala di ba. Mafru-frustrate ka talaga, pero kung may Kristo ka naman sa puso mo, sinong pang hihigit sa Kanya? Diba? Diba????

I think frustration is non sense, given the fact even a faith small like candle can lit you up in to a raging 🔥 The disciples got frustrated? ewan ko pero lahat ng bumangga sa kanila giba, Paul? Mas epic pa ginawa nya and all the man of faith in Christian history, like the Puritans.

Life is cruel nowadays in a different way, hindi mo kailangang physically maaksidente para mag-panic, tunog pa lang ng viber notification, pang-meme na agad yung reaction. 😳

When we're frustrated, we're troubled, no peace, sheep-on-panic, God amnesiac mode-on. I know we have different reasons about it but if you a child of God, the everlasting arm of Christ the comforter is waiting. All your frustration was already been nailed on that cross. Take heart, run to Him all you weary and take rest.

“Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.” — Matthew 11:28-30

written in Tagalog-English originally posted: July 30, 2022

Wala ko maisip na topic, walang nag-suggest eh, ang hina ko talaga, pero oks lang. Life runs like that way, but if you want it that way. Takbuhan mo din si life.

Memories of Melody and Harmony

Never in my layp na that I'll learn to play a musical instrument pero ever since childhood, our father's gitara is nakakalat lang sa bahay. My bigbro plays too, i think its one part of growing up in a Xtian household, musical instrument is given if the believer pursue or long to sing praise to God. Lalo na if may house Bible studies, ngl, before 10 y/o ako naririnig ko na yung mga 90's na worship song na mabenta that time. Siguro sa iba organ/keyboard/piano, sa iba drums? Or violin , rondalla, bandaya kawayan, kanta ng ng Sintang Paaralan...okay stop.

Thats a legit HiStory to me. Then there was a time in my life when I opened my eyes...the guitar was infront of me + a song hits (of xtian song + a cd )na instrumental) sa irrc its a minus one then ung kanta nasa song hits then sing it, buti na lang mag melody to follow. I learned to sing “ As the Deer” that time, not hearing the original song itself. Then may kanta din ng Hillsong yung “in your hands” that was my first song to play and sing synchronized, took me 1 month to learn basic chords, 2 months oks na.

Sobrang hype ko nun pagkauwi gitara, nalala ko pa nagalit si mama pinaglaba ako after ko mag gitara. Omg. I was 2nd yr H/s that time. Fast forward, our church that time decline in musicians, and the team that time took me to play drums.

Searching the Right Tune Beyond Expectation

Learned to play the basic 3 except keys pero inaral ko din basic chords para atleast alam ko mangopya ng chords pag di ko alam yung kanta.

4th year H/S that time was sweet, no im not on a relationship that time (basted e) sweet in a way, part of me need to learn more about the instrument. The passion is burning, baka maging uling ka pag hinawakan kita.

Entering college, I hate math, pero nakapasok sa Eng'g. Its a blessing kuya chor was the catalyst to teach me in depth and learned lead guitars. Yup self learning since then, cant read notes but I know power tab, guitar pro, and the tab it self.

Got interested into a dozen of music genre too.

Ang kickback lang, the frustration when you dont get want you want. Yung iba magaling, ikaw hindi, sya pogi, ako mas pogi diba? Umoo ka nalang.

There was an article about musician growth, horizontal and vertical. I can say I'd grow vertically. Learn the techniques the speed, the scale etc but never learned quite a handful of song. Though the technique helps to learn songs, pero minsan un nga frustration pag di mo nakuha.

As a guitar player, I always look at the guitarist during worship service kapag alam ko, ui may singit doon, ui may lead na kaunti doon etc. Its kind of distraction din sa totoo lang. Though i nee thought na, sana ako yung andoon. I know the feeling yung andoon sa taas noh. Its not just a performance or anything.

Unlimited Supply of Sweetened Grace Encapsulated by His Everlasting Love that Resonates Eternity

2003-2016 yan ang career ko hahaha, nahinto eh since started working in the city. Kasama na din jan yung nagkaroon ng banda, pero di nagkajowa pambihira. Learned a lot not just music also deepening the faith. Worship in music isn't run by emotion but kung paano tayo nakatukod sa pananampalataya kay Lord. May time na tumatayo ako na hindi ako okay, iba yung tunog pramis. Ano pa silbi ng pag strum ko ng gitara kung walang pag ibig?

Back in the OT days, the Levites are skillful kasi they are dedicated in the temple. Isa sa mga inspiration ko, pero now na on hiatus i can still be skillful pa din naman sa ibang bagay sa buhay ne?

Thats me sharing memories about how I learned playing guitar. Masakit sya sobra tapos maglalaba pagkatapos, tapos bath towel pa walang washing machine, katapusan ko na!!!!

Sinulat ko ng impromptu kaya pasensya na saali mali, atleast sana na enjoy mo. Salamat.

originally posted: July 23, 2022

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me. -Psalm 23:4 NASB

Whenever I'm lost and stress, this verse pulls me off from the miry clay as well when I really lost it, yung bang wala ka na sa hulog or wisyo. Kasi naging sheep na sa Isaiah 53 eh. Feeling plain rice.

All of us like sheep have gone astray, Each of us has turned to his own way; But the LORD has caused the iniquity of us all To fall on Him. -Isaiah 53:6 NASB

But if you look both verse, the one who gives comforts also sacrificed himself...sa pasaway na tupa.

Cause Christ loves abounds, yun lang.

originally posted July 23, 2022

Mga Simula

Welcome to my new blog after 48 years of searching my writers voice, ganun pa din naman, walang pinagbago. I had 3 blogs before pero deleted na sila lahat, its about personal development, writing and nakalimutan ko na yung isa. Meron akong isang existing sa Medium pero di ko bet yung social media function nya. I prefer yung ganito lang, if you know the blog Zen Habits, simple lang yung UI.

That's for the intro, decide to write and test the three C's, commitment, consistency and content. I failed back then sa 3 blog, pero committed po ako if ever maging tayo, promise. My only problem is the content kaya mejo epic fail na sa iba. Kaya ngayon ang content ko, isipin mo na lang sumasayaw ako sa Tiktok. Joke, wala...wala akong content...kasi content na ako sayo.

Mga Tanong

Siguro minsan marahil nabasa nyo yung linya na “boring yet graceful” sa IG ko ne? Its just my profound thinking back then that I'm a boring person (coming from me) but God is graceful. That's when I coined that phrase. Cool diba? Please say yes na lang po. Also nasa isip ko din mga figure skater at ballerina ang graceful ng moves nila pero boring panoorin, kaya hindi ako nanonood.

As for the entries, I'll try weekly muna. Hirap gumawa ng content, kakanta ba ko o sasayaw? Ipipinta na lang kita sa puso ko baka sakaling mapasakin ka, di ko man maipangako sayo ang bituin, buwan at araw. Mananatili ikaw lamang ang tanging mamahalin sinta....okay stop (in Japanese accent)

Okay, hindi po hugot to para sa crush ko (pero sana mabasa nya, ingats poh, wink wink) The entries will be a collection of random stuff, you don't need to subscribe or like it. I just want to write and polish the unsung talent, sulipat din grammar ko, I knew.

Random stuff, maybe from Puritans to IU or ano yung almusal ko, bakit upset yung stomach, nalaglag ako sa kanya pero di ako sinalo, mga ganun ba ... And I will only post the link once, kaya hindi nyo na mababasa yung older post unless i save nyo yung content, sesendan ko kayo ng DMCA, copyright infringements.

Mga Katapusan

If you had fun reading please share, NO stop! Just want to cherish this content with few people from my IG circles. Ako yung mata, kayo yung eyebag, diba sobrang close? You circle around me. Epic na joke. Sana bumenta.

If you have comments, suggestions or violent and vehement reaction. Just DM me, I'll send my Gcash QR code for every inquiry lol. Okay, see ya next chapter. Thanks!

Decision

Decided to stop doing the 0.x chapters and go straight with it. Now I'm doing the entry in my phone.

Blog entries will be called chapters as it's a chapter of my boring life which I'm trying to share with. Sure Youtuber and Tiktoker are all around but I'm happy with plain words which really reflect who I am.

I speak less since that day though the pandemic also hits and yes, now I speak more less unless there is a report to be done in our work or talking with someone.

My goal is to have 100 chapters in this blog.

It can be simultaneously entry every day, talking about this and that, life and faith, and work and maybe love life if I ever found or God gave me her unless she accept my confession. I'll be rejected for sure, 100% sure. Maraming beses akong na-basted noong college ha, though grateful those ladies are already married and happy. Ano kaya plano ni Lord sakin?

Me? I don't know, life is in pain on that part. Well, my old man and lady are now looking for seed. Me? God, I know you love me but how to fall inlove again romantically? Why this heart so pessimistic though I have a crush. Its weird, well thats me.

Boring

Forget love life for the mean time, if all my crush (plural) got married for the next 12 months, well I'm grateful, then less pain in head thinking, what move I'll do, atleast there's a dude manly enough that loved them. No regrets about that, nagbibilang ako, may dalawa na taken na, engage na ata yung isa.

If I have some funds I'll just try this platform and write my drafts using Jotterpad, so that'll be an added backup.

This is another writing and blogging journey, after what I did last 2013. Somehow life moves on. Frustrated ako noon, and I think still now? I don't know.

Progress

It's been a question for me these days too, accomplishments or progress? I know ton of people are accomplishments freak, but I'm part of the latter one.

Small snail like progress means to me, someone who is frustrated a lot, someone is just like an air in this life yet thanks God, kasi atleast higit pa ako sa hangin dahil sa Kanya.

Small progress is better than regress, being late is better than never. Small things are still big for those trying their best to overcome life, as they hold hands with God. Either walk or crawl. When foot prints on the sand became dragged on the sand.

Life Is

The Christian life is not always joyful as we travel here on earth, we're not for this place but a place better far more where joy blooms in His presence.

Okay, moving on also I'll only share new post via bird app. I'm just a bottom-tier character and I don't want to stand out. I'll just be grateful for those who will read this stuff. Me, sharing and talking boring things, like my favorite ball pen or my crush is....

Anothet goal, is every chapter will be 500 characters. Life is nice as we grow old and and grow up, but part of me still young and aspiring. See you next chapter.

Magugustuhan pa kaya ako ng crush ko kung mukha namang gutter yung mukha ko unless pumunta ako sa North Korea para mag pa-Photoshop kasama ng nuke ni Mr. Kim. Pwede din naman sa Thailand kaya lang baka pagbalik ko, hindi na ako, “ako” (opposite noong nasa Galatians). Oks, thats for the intro, hirap mag type sa tablet ha.

Akala ko hindi ko na masusundan, pero ito, trying my best to be consistent. Kahit yung lang, also anim na araw na ang yung trial. Gusto ko sana himingi ng tulong via Gcash to my “dear readers” kaya lang baka isipin nyo scam lang. And the blog it live to its name, kasi walang traffic, kaya boring in a sense.

Yung sermon last Sunday, tumatak sakin yung “what kind of instrument are you?”. Though yung word na sanctification I read it during college days, pero didn't ring in my head. NGL, lately ko lang naintindihan yung deep theological things about it, Romans ba naman, at alam ko din naman, na binilabago tayo ni Lord araw-araw, but its up to us, the Holy Spirit guide us, pero choose, daan o kanal? Yung bang masikip na yung daan, pipiliin pa din yung kanal.

Back to what kind of instrument are you, instrument of sin or grace? Then ang cool ng tunog ng “instrument of grace” parang yung FB account na nag rant about Kpop and being a Christian, btw may bagong album SNSD!, Yung account nya sa Twitter @redemptivegrace, ang cool din pero iba yung dating once you read his/her post.

Every believer is an instrument of grace, once you take hold of it, alam mo yung feeling na perfection but we aren't, yet somehow we must aim for it. Then shoot lang din yung devo about joy. After love is joy, sa mga fruits na sweet and juicy sa Galatians.

I'll just focus on joy ne? Kasi if walang joy, how can you be an instrument of grace, para lang batingaw na nag-iingay ng walang kabuluhan. Also joy is tested in perseverance which fuel the Christian to be an instrument him/herself.

Lately, I'm asking do I still have joy inspite of? Pero I'm still grateful pa din naman, kaya lang ang hirap once may contradiction. Please pray for me na lang.

If we want to be an instrument of His grace, then more time with Him and also things about Him must be invested which is the answer above. Di ba, hindi cool, ako?

Okay, nasaan na yung outline, wala pala. Ang kulit lang din ng term, as we become instrument of grace, we both reach people na walang pang personal relationship with Christ as well, we are an instrument as we sing our praise to our Creator.

If you read until to this point, that would be all. Thanks.

I already forgot things about it and also the characters, but I'll try my best, so stay with me. This will be fast.

It's the book I read during that time, its really memorable read then after that event I still continue reading it. Along with my Bible reading that time, its the other book that pull the tears out of my eye socket when Aslan comes. I don't know but it made the word “yearning” and “longing” more meaningful.

That scene when both girls looking for him, and when they found him or he just reveal himself, forgot it. The joy. I did cry in that part too.

Eternity. Death.

Two big words and it depends to the person how he or she weigh those two words.

Lets focus on eternity. Do you long for it? Do you yearn for it? Are you in pain when you say, come Lord Jesus come.

Reminds me of Christians during the Roman Empire and throughout the Church history where those who believe got persecuted.

Yet the burning desire and longing fuel them, running the race in the path less taken until that day comes, that'll they see Him face to face.

If we find ourselves with a desire that nothing in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that we were made for another world. —C.S. Lewis

Note: isinulat sa Taglish

Wordpress is cool, and Simplenote is simple but I'm looking for aesthetics too, then I found this blogging platform last year, signed up, wrote something, got bored, deleted it with no drafts behind, oh I loved burning bridges with my creativity but not relationships ha, sila lang naman mahilig mang-iwan, then I deleted the free account.

Guess what? They are now paid. OMG. I rant sa bird app, then got a response. Rant talaga eh.

This is a 14-day trial didn’t put my card kasi wala ng laman, SM Disadvantage Card pwede ba? at may new subscribtion plan daw sila na mas mura...lets see, for sure. I'll be force to write kahit wala na kwenta sinasabi ko, atleast hindi ako Tiktoker or Youtuber. I won't earn din naman, eh kung sya ang prize, panalo talaga.

But there was a time I'd create a Tiktok account just to follow a certain being, ala natuwa lang ako. Epic lang algorithm ng Tiktok, its bad for my eyes, I chose what I need to see , like the way I eye on h...lol, kaya delete account, uninstall, sayonara. IG na lang. 🙃

Being plain, and boring and absolutely weird, as someone says, is my genre, though madami na nagsabi. Madami ba talaga? All I can say it's part being of “Lopez ka nga talaga” not the family from the south ha, but from the north, pero di rin po ako BBM, pwede siguro ako na lang ang BBmo BBmo.

Did check bird app, at madami din gumagamit nito, siguro noong free pa, some are Indonesian or Malaysian or Indian? Ewan ko, na-curious lang naman, parang ako sa kanya kaya lang saka na lang.

Tindi bawat paragraph may hugot. Tapos sa huli, iba pala ang huhugot sa kanya, siya pala at hindi ako, ano na?, justice, where is?

On the other hand, sa kabilang kamay.

I started buklating an old devotional I bought when I stepped foot here in the metro after my first week sa work. It was my first Sunday service, decided to go to Galleria, sa Victory Ortigas, nilakod ko ate kuya, probinsyano e. Nag Google maps pa ko noon, January 2016 yun .

It was an influential devotional ni tatay ko which I read back during college days. My Utmost For His Highest by Oswald Chambers. If you check Walls of Nehemiah before, tadtad ng quotes niya mga post ko doon iirc, wala nga lang aesthetics.

Father's copy was a gift edition, ganda grabe, sa sobrang gamit, nag divorce na yung mga pages. The one I have was the ordinary paperback updated edition. So happy at less nose bleed, kasi yung kay father dear, KJV, the updated one used NKJV. Sakin naman, naligo sa highlights at underline at fold.

Though I have other devos, even digitally, I think you'll return to the one that really push you. I do have na yung 2 volume ng Voices from the Past, pero magagamit din sila.

Devotionals are just patikim sa mas matinding handa ni Lord sa'tin, I'm sure meron mga nag strike talaga sa puso nyo noong nabasa nyo yung mensahe, kahit nakalimutan mo na yung backup na verse.

Waiting is not sitting with folded hands doing nothing, but it is learning to do what we are told. —O.C.